So I would think that after graduating I would have a lot more time to work, blog and start up my own PR stuff on the side. The thing is I do I am just too lazy! I missed my father's day post (sorry dad you will be getting a great one for your birthday) and I need to redesign the blog too.
My decision has been made: instead of saying that I will blog everyday or every week or after every vacation I am just going to do my best to keep up! I think that if I don't feel the pressure I have a lot more fun with doing these things.
Anyways lets go back to the 4th of July, which feels like forever ago! Kendall's 5 siblings, significant others and kids and his parents all came up to Island Park for our annual family vacation. Kendall's parents rented an awesome cabin and we all came up for about 5 days and had so much fun spending time together and enjoying the beauty of Island Park and West Yellowstone. If you ever need a getaway that is the place to go! It is gorgeous, there are no distractions and there is a chance to see wild life everywhere.
Kendall's family (well the men) really enjoy shooting and guns. So on this trip we of course needed to get a little shooting practice in. We went twice on the 5 day trip and on the second day I FINALLY hit 5 clay pigeons in a row and shattered 3 of those!
We also floated the river, went to West Yellowstone for a parade and fireworks (worst fire works, never again, but so fun to be with family!) and we visited the Crabtree cabin to say hello to my family. Also! While we were in West Yellowstone and went to the Playmill to watch Beauty and the Beast, it is a small theatre but it was amazing. If you are ever up in that area go visit the Playmill it is an amazing experience and the actors and actresses are amazing!
This was the best George family vacation yet and I am excited for next years! I love seeing Kendall around his family and our nieces and nephews. I have realized that family is the MOST important thing and the time we spend with family helps build our relationships and regardless if family are yours by birth or marriage the relationship is important. I am grateful for my family and the family I was blessed to marry into.
The Island Park trip was a blast and now Kendall and I are excited for our California vacation with my family in August!
Saw this on Facebook while writing this post and thought it totally fit this post!
Also side note: Many of you know that Kendall and I LOVE to play ultimate frisbee and the last two semesters we have played with friends and although we got moved up in the leagues and did not win it was such a fun experience. We played with a ton of friends and really had a blast in the summer months playing and getting out doors.
Beautiful Big Springs in Island Park
Obviously we had to do a George family selfie!
Aaaand a 4th of July selfie
OUr cute niece Sadie at the park on 4th of July
Now there is just something sexy about a man and a gun ;)
Well after the pictures, phone calls, facebook posts and gift you are probably tired of me saying HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY! But I decided that maybe I just needed to tell you just a little bit more how much you mean to me. After being married I find that I am closer to my mom then ever before. I thought that maybe my mom would not play as big a role in my life once I was married but who am I kidding?! She helps ALL the time! The role of a mom never stops, that is why they are so amazing because it is constant love for our whole lives and more!
My mom is a super hero! She comes to my house and makes it pretty, gives me recipes, calls me when I need it and helps me polish my skills to land a job! O and she sends her love each day... I would say she is pretty great!
Also, if you know me, at times I can be the biggest pain and my mom puts up with it! I am so grateful to her and for all that she does. There are certain things things and ways of life we do not agree on but my is always my cheerleader no matter what! I have an amazing example of a mom and hope that I can be half the mom she is one day!
I have been thinking a lot about moms and really how much they do for each and every one of us. I mean dads do a lot too and I will get to that in June but really moms just are amazing! I think I may be a little bias because I am a girl so I can talk to mom about all those things that boys don't want to talk about and also she tells it how it is. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints put together a video on moms that I will post but they also started the hashtag #itwasmom. For some reason that really hit home for me because when I think back, it really was mom, there to wipe the dirt off a scrape, tell you how dumb a boy was to break your heart, pick you up when your down and get you ready for marrying the boy of your dreams! #itwasmom
So again Mom, thank you for being my example and teaching me about life! It amazes me how strong a woman you are and how much time you make for me even when you don't have enough for yourself.
I also want to say thank you to my amazing mother-in-law for raising the man I call my husband and welcoming me into the family with open arms. I cannot wait for more family fun and lots more delicious recipes and crafts to come! We always enjoy the time spent with you and I love being able to sit and chat and for all that you do for Kendall and I. Thank you and we love you!
To my future kids,
You have the best grandma and I hope that I will be just as patient and loving and understanding as she is. Always count on Grandma for fun trips, yummy food and extra hugs and kisses when you need them. I hope that when I become your mom I will be able to provide the love and best friend relationship that she does to for me. Your grandma taught me to be myself by being herself and treating everyone with kindness and never turning down an opportunity to serve. One day kids when you are here you will realize your grandma is pretty awesome! (Don't worry mom, no grand kids yet just a reminder to myself of how I should be!)
Best Momma Around!
Me and my wonderful mother-in-law!
Best mother-in-law and mom there is!
Love you mom!
My sister has taught me so many things as well about being a mom and I look up to her in so many ways! Happy Mother's day to you too Steph, love you! Thank you for love and example to me!
So with my title I thought about a few different ways in blogging tonight and I was going to have something about being let down and such but then I thought of patience and timing! So now you probably are all just like what the heck Sam?! Just tell me what is going on!
Okay first, it is not about a baby! Second I FINALLY got a job! To some of you that may just be like woo hoo yay a job (in sarcastic not so happy tones) but let me tell you why it is so great. So on April 11th I graduated with my bachelor's in communications from BYU-Idaho (I will post pictures soon, just need to stop being lazy and download them from my mom). Anyways, yes, I AM A COLLEGE GRADUATE!
I was going to do a whole post on graduating which I probably still will but let me tell you that it is great not having to do homework every night and projects and just being able to hang out. Well, I thought it would be great to hang out and until I was doing WAY to much of that for me to handle.
So this job search thing, I started about a month and a half or so because graduation in looking for a job because I knew that it would be really tough to find a job (little did I know how to tough) so I thought I would not procrastinate for one time in my life and get the ball rolling. Well that was a shot in the dark.
After about a month I realized that people just did not want me and then I would see more adds and do more interviews and I still got the same, "Sorry we decided to go with someone else, but you were our second choice." PEOPLE I need a "You are our first choice NOT second choice answer." By this week I am pretty sure I was up to about 15 let downs. And let me tell you I tried to keep my head held high but then last week I got another NO and ya know just sat on the floor and cried like a baby. Then I went to the gym and elpiticized it out until I could not move any more!
So then after that I think I applied for about 8 more jobs and the next day I had a job interview for this great company but thought I rambled so I was a little discouraged but I knew I had the abilities so I would just wait. Then I was interested in this temp position that would be great and that became a great a possibility!
Then came Friday, I had a group interview (very new experience) and walk straight out of that and listened to a message on my phone. It was the company from the day before.... I GOT THE JOB! I was so excited I could not even believe myself!
Kendall was working so of course I had to run in and tell him first! I will give more details later on the job but it doesn't start until Wednesday so I don't to get too excited before I start and make sure that I do okay! But a side note... I may be able to start doing events and marketing for the company as well so I get to use and get more experience on things in my major. But in this I have realized that Heavenly Father keeps reminding through out many instances that I need to be patient. I also have gained a very strong testimony that doing those "little things" help lift, strengthen and bring you closer to Heavenly Father in so many different ways!
This may have been a trial but I learned to trust in the Lord and His timing and know that he knows what is best and in this case he knew the best job for me! I am grateful for Heavenly Father and this struggle and his help and faith in me! I am so grateful for my friends, family and amazing husband who helped me constantly find opportunities and keep on keepin' on.
Also little side note, right after I graduated I read Stephanie Nielson's book "Heaven Is Here." She is an icon to me with blogging to begin with and I love her story but after reading this book I decided that I cannot complain about anything and I need to have the outlook she did as she was healing because she always put her faith in Heavenly Father and he helped her grow and continue on with her life. So Stephanie Nielson if you ever read this (which is very unlikely) thank you for helping me through this time with your writing and hilarious blog!
Here is her book... check it out. This woman is seriously amazing!
I did it! Now I can say I am a successful graduate FINALLY starting on with a job! (photo cred: my amazing hubby Kendall)
I am a grateful girl today! I have an amazing husband who held me when I cried after let downs on jobs and always my biggest cheerleader! Thank you mom and dad for cheering me on and also being my biggest fans! And thank you to all other friends and family who helped and supported me! Thank you to my Heavenly Father who is always rooting for me and helping me in every way! I know I probably already said all these things but just feel that these people really help me all the time!
Okay so hopefully my rant was not too annoying... but it was mostly just a ramble like most posts! I will post again soon... I hope this jobs go well and I am excited!
This is a week late but I just have to talk about my wonderful Easter Sunday! I am so grateful for the Savior and his atoning sacrifice for all of us! On Easter Kendall and I watched the History Channel's Bible series where they showed the episodes of Christ's life and the crucifixion and Resurrection. This a tradition we have started as we love being reminded of all the acts that Christ has done for us. On Easter we also had a wonderful church meeting that reminded me of how many time Christ has saved me.
I have gone through many challenges in my life, really because I put myself there and Christ has ALWAYS been there to help me and bring me back. Christ is my savior and helped me find my testimony in the church just three years ago and today I am happily married and trying to be the best I can because of Him!
Because of Him I can be a better daughter, wife, disciple, mother (someday) and person. The atonement used to be so much for me but now it is something I live for. Christ has forgiven me because of the Atonement and has helped me continue to be a daughter of God. I am so grateful Christ, I know there is no way I can ever repay him for everything he has done for me but I do know that if I strive to live the gospel each and everyday, remember and use the atonement when I need to and always look to Christ that in someway that is thanking him for all he has done for me.
As you can tell, I truly love Easter!
This year the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints started a campaign #becauseofhim. The social media efforts of the church were amazing! There was an instagram week challenge with different reasons we can do things because of him. I encourage all to take a peek here where you can see the Church's efforts and watch the great video they put together.
Later that day Kendall and I went to my Aunt and Uncle's for dinner and had such a delicious meal! We were very grateful to be with family and were reminded that because of him we have families and can be with them for eternity!
Our Easter truly was amazing and I am so grateful I was able to spend it will so many and of the people I love!
#becauseofhim I know that I can return to him and continuing to keep being better at every part of my life!
Happy Eater from the George's and our bike!
Happy day & Happy Sunday!
Stay tuned for my graduation post coming this week!
Now if people are not already fed up with me from the last post I really am sorry if this makes you even more annoyed at me. The last post was on same-sex attraction and now this one is on abortion. This one is dear to my heart because I think that ending a little life really is just not fair.
The chapter I read for this week's lesson touched on all the reasons why women want an abortion. It could be because they are too young, not married, were sexually abused, the baby has complications or they feel they have the choice because it is their body.
Now with those with complications. The church has said to council with church leaders, Heavenly Father and your spouse on this because in these cases the mom could be in danger of loosing her life or the baby may have a defect that will keep them living for more than a few hours of being born. Also with sexual abuse, that is a tough one and council with church leaders would be very beneficial.
Elder Russell M. Nelson explains the views of the church perfectly on abortion, "As sons and daughters of God, we cherish life as a gift from our Heavenly Father. It is eternal, as he is eternal. Innocent life is not sent by him to be destroyed! This doctrine is not of me, but is that of the living God and of his divine Son." I really could not think of a better way to explain why we must not abort a life. Heavenly Father put that life on this earth to learn and grow and become a son or daughter of God. It is not our right to say if can be taken away or not, Heavenly Father gave us the privilege to provide a life and that privilege should not be taken lightly.
Something else I also thought of was those moms who cannot have kids or have a really hard time having children. They would give anything to have a baby so if you have the opportunity to be a mom then take that as an honor and be the best mom you can be or use adoption so these moms can have the opportunity to have children. I know that some children may not be born into ideal circumstances and if people feel that they cannot care for the child LDS Family Services is always there to help those of the LDS faith make a decision and find parents to adopt if that is the way they want to go.
The First Presidency of the church came out with a statement in 1991 on abortion. In this statement they give "a few suggestions for preserving and defending the sanctity of life in legal and appropriate ways." Those six ways are: "maintain and promote chastity and fidelity. Help provide for unwed parents. Become more informed. Discuss the sanctity of life accurately and appropriately. Recognize the consequences of abortion. Strengthen our testimonies of the sanctity of life." More on abortion and the church's stance on it can be found on lds.org. You can type in abortion and find many talks, aticles and statements on the topic.
I have a testimony that each of us is a child of God and we are all sent to this earth for a purpose. I am sorry if I was preachy but I hope that we can all see that these little children have as much as a right to live as we do. Prolife.
Here is a video on a 12 years old view on abortion, this kid is pretty amazing!
Now please no one hunt me down and scold me for this post. Forewarning: these are my views and the teachings of the gospel, I respect those who think and feel differently and would like the same. This week's lesson was on different problems and trials in families but this chapter I am going to focus on is on Same-sex attraction. Now before I even start I want to share a link to two chapters in the ebook, "Understanding Same-Sex Attraction: Where to Turn and How to Help." This is a book by the church to help those understand same-sec attraction and what the church's stance is on it. One of the chapters is from a different lesson but they go hand-in-hand. When on the site, read chapters 7&8. they really helped me see more on how the church feels about same-sex attraction and how all of us can be better at understanding it and being less judgmental. Find the chapters here. Also, please refer back to The Family: A Proclamation the World to read on why the family with a husband and wife is very important in this life. The topic of gay-marriage is very prevalent today and really I have no idea where to start. I know that within the my faith that the importance of family is #1 and that we are to defend that with everything we have. It takes a man and woman to have children and thus have a family. Now, I am not against those with same-sex attraction I love you all with all my heart. In the gospel we are taught to love the sinner and hate the sin. I have nothing against those who think differently than I do. In the book the author brings up many different topics that really capture the essence of same-sex attraction. There are many reasons in which people want to legalize same-sex marriage. It is about the rights, the equality and the money. There are many benefits to being married and being recognized as such in the government. Most of these aspects we have all heard before. I want my opinion on this to be heard. I was able to read a lot about this topic in this lesson and have learned that same-sex attraction is definitely a struggle that some are born with that Heavenly Father has given them to overcome. Now that may sound harsh but Heavenly Father does not give any of us a struggle we cannot over come. There have been many studies stating that they cannot pin point if people are born with same-sex attraction but I have come to realize that this attraction can come from genes, peers, the media and most importantly agency. All of this is in Chapter 8 of the ebook I recommend above. I do not want to make this long but I know that same-sex attraction is becoming more and more an issue in the church. The best thing we can do is teach our children the sanctity of marriage and if we do have children with this struggle we love them unconditionally and do what we can to help them in how they want us to. Same-sex marriage is something I do not stand for because I know that from the beginning of time marriage has been ordained of God for a man and woman. Although, those who do live this life style simply live differently than I do and I would welcome them into my life with open arms and love them but that does not mean I have to agree with the life they live. We are all individuals and have the agency to choose the way in which we live. I strongly suggest to pray for guidance if you are having trouble with this and know that Heavenly Father wants each of us to return to him. The last thing that I found really interesting is that the church says that those with same-sex attraction are to live the law of chasity just like heterosexual couples. Like I have said before Heavenly Father really answers our prayers and concerns in great ways. Now I have been struggling with this issue for awhile now because I do not want to come off as rude or mean but I know the way I feel and cannot help but stand up for what I know to be right. Today during the morning session of the April 2014 General Conference, Elder Andersen of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles gave a great talk on the subject of same-sex attraction. The link to conference is here. I recommend this talk to all and think he really but it perfectly. I should have just posted the talk and not said anything else. I hope I was able to explain my views well enough and hope I did not offend anyone. It is a new goal of mine to not judge those that live this life because we simply are different and live differently. Happy day & Happy Saturday!
So I am young and in love, but apparently marriage takes work to keep up (just kidding I knew that!). From this week's lesson I focus on marriage in the later years and how to keep the spark alive. When being married for many, many years, couples go through a lot of ups and downs together and sometimes that can put a strain on a marriage but we can all get through that if we put in the effort.
The book talked about a few things that can be hard to deal with when growing older, those being the empty nest, caring for loved ones and loss of loved ones. Now we all know that our parents LOVE when we move out but also it must be quite strange to not have kids living at home anymore. This quote puts it perfectly from the book, "A wife married for 33 years said, "It's important to build a good relationship with your spouse so that when the children leave, you have the underlying joy of focusing on each other and not your adult children." I feel like that sums up things for me, we need to build relationships with our spouses before children and during the years of raising them so we can foster those relationships when the children are older and out of the house. I think something else to focus on is remember that you are your spouses number one priority and vs. Please still care and love your children, but that relationship with your spouse is so tender and important that it always needs to be top on the priority list, right under Heavenly Father and Christ.
When loss of loved ones comes to couples, the book really focuses on grieving together and helping each other through the time. Loss of loved ones can be a problem with couples but if we help each other and cleave to the gospel and remember that we are all mortal than I feel that they may help with the situation. Elder Russell M. Nelson said this on death, " The only length of life that seems to satisfy the longings of the human heart is life everlasting. Irrespective of age, we mourn for those loved and lost. Mourning is one of the deepest expressions of pure love. It is a natural response in complete accord with divine commandment: 'Thou shalt love together in love, insomuch that thou shalt weep for the loss of them that die' (D&C 42:45). Moreover, we can't fully appreciate joyful reunions later without tearful separations now. The only way to take sorrow out of death is to take love out of life." This quote sums up to me that we are to mourn and miss those that are gone but still have a spot in our hearts for those living and loving us, especially our spouses. Now I know loosing a spouse is even harder but we have eternal marriages and I cannot even imagine not having Kendall there everyday but after this life we will be together forever and that goes for all sealed together in the temple!
Now I am not to that many years of marriage yet but I look forward to the many many years Kendall and I have and I know that as we focus on the Lord and each other we can continue to bring happiness to each other in our lives. I am grateful for these little tips and hopefully they helped some others and for those of us who do not need this yet, we can look back upon it later.
Happy day & Happy April!
This Mormon Message is very cute and shows that we can be what we need to be to each other through the years of marriage, our spouses are our best friends and we love them!
So I LOVED this lesson, it is a little bit happier than the last few, well I think so but I find it to be great! This lesson focused on work at home and wholesome family activities. The first chapter I want to just touch on was titled, "The Meanings and Blessings of Family Work." I really liked that the author of this chapter started with talking about Adam and Eve and when they left the Garden of Eden they had to work to sustain themselves and make a shelter and find food. The book said this on family work, "Family work provides endless opportunities to recognize and fill other's needs."
I know we all love (HATE) chores but secretly our parents were teaching us very valuable lessons by making us vacuum the stairs and clean the dog poop up. As we work together as families to keep a home clean, we gain more respect for the place where we live and we also learn the value of work and how important it is in our lives.
Each week I have a group that I meet with a group about different lesson activities we did to go with the lesson, and within this week's lesson we talked about how you can definitely tell the difference between children who were taught to work from a young age and those who were not accepted to do so in their families. Those chores and jobs parents had us do while growing up, really taught us the value of a dollar with allowance and also how important it is to contribute in the family.
The book also gave me a short history reminder on how men started leaving home and working in factories and so did children, which left all the work to mom at home (thanks a lot)! This was a big problem in the 1900's but I think it has gotten better because growing up my parents still had jobs but at home we all did our chores on Saturday.
Family work has definitely changed from everything being at home like schooling and growing and raising all of our foods, but it still is important to work with the house you have. Some people may have to do farm work and others may need to do yard work, dust their rooms and help clean the other areas in the house. As we work together we learn respect for the house our parents worked very hard to have for us and we gain respect for our parents and each other. I have learned through my parents, my husband and this chapter that teaching our children chores and the value of work,and getting a job is important to not only help the family but start saving to help future families.
I am going to close in just a small blurp on family recreation (this is the fun part of the lesson). The book siad this on family recreation, "Wholesome family recreation can help us strengthen our relationships and reduce negative emotional and spiritual consequences. Wholesome recreation strengthen families." There was a lot from this chapter but what I got is that family time is VERY important! Wholesome recreation helps stregthen bonds with children and spouses. Activities where we are doing things together and as families is how we strengthen relationships. One person playing video games and the other on their phone but in the same room "watching a movie" does NOT count as wholesome recreation. Family time helps builds bonds and brings marriages closer together. One form of this is FHE, focus on putting away the phones and focusing on each other. The book said this on children and activities, "As adolescents develop their own identities, they evaluate personal experiences, interests, and skills. Varied, diverse, fun, and non-threatening recreational experiences help adolescents identify activities they enjoy."
Go on vacations, go to the park, go camping, watch a good movie, eat dinner together. These things help children grow and learn the value of relationships and families. If we do things together as a family and put away the distractions of the world, we come to realize what is really important in this world. I have taken my own little spin on this chapter but I have a testimony of the importance of family time and know that as we take time to sit down and talk with one another, relationship and memories are born.
My husband and I have started a summer bucket list (which I need to write down and stick on our fridge) to do with each other this summer and we will continue to make them throughout our marriage for not just the summer. The bucket list will grow with more time and funds. My point being is, start with a bucket list, sit down with your spouse or family and make a list of things that EVERYONE wants to do. Not everyone has to agree on the activities but don;t just pick ones that some people like, let each person choose a few.
My greatest memories with my families are road trips and times when it was just us and now my husband and I are building those memories and it is so fun when you are with the ones you love, without the distractions of work, school and life, where you can enjoy each other and have fun with family! I hope my rant wasn't too bad and I want to hear your bucket list... we may need some more ideas!
Happy day and Happy Saturday!
You all are probably so extremely tired of me just going on and on and on about all things that I "think" I know about the family but I am just learning so much and this project is so fun for me.This week let's talk prayer. I just want to focus on one chapter this week because to me prayer is something very important to me, the other chapters were too but this stood out to me the most.
The chapter that stood out to me in this week's lesson on Family Happiness was called, "Sanctification and Cooperation: How Prayer Helps Strengthen Relationships in Good Times and Heal Relationships in Bad Times." The title alone spoke to me, because let me tell you, IT REALLY WORKS!
There are times in marriages and families where you are so irritated at the person and you do not want to even look at them, but bed time prayers need to happen, and as soon as that prayer starts the heart is softened. An apostle talked about that, but I cannot think of who it was right now.
My book said this on prayer, "Prayer is the means by which individuals may invite God to play an active role in their relationship." This is very true. Through this lesson and the examples in my life I have quickly come to see that as we kneel in payer to our Heavenly Father, he will guide us in all that we need to know at that time.
One thing I know to be true is family prayer with children is very important, doing morning and night prayers with children sets an example for them to start saying their own prayers when they are old enough to do so. My sister does this with her family and all of her children ages; 8,6 and 4 say their prayers (the 4 year old needs some help but it is so cute!) and they have a baby but she can only listen right now because she is too young. But my point being that these kids are learning from their parents what prayer means and how much it can help with everything!
I have a personal testimony that prayer helps in all things, Kendall and I have turned to Heavenly Father through prayer in so many ways just in our short 7 months of marriage for guidance in all things marriage. I am grateful that Heavenly Father doesn't mind listening to me and is there is to help us if we ask.
I want to close with this quote from this chapter by Dallin H. Oaks, "If you are already descending into the low state of marraige-in-name-only, please join hands, kneel together, and prayerfully plead for help and the healing power of the Atonement. Your humble and united pleadings with bring you closer to the Lord and to each other and will help you in the hard climb back to marital hamony." This quote is very powerful and do not take it as prayer only helps with the big problems but I know that it helps with the little annoyances as well.
Prayer is great for everything, be sure to pray is give thanks to Heavenly Father for blessing you with a temple marriage and family as well, he likes to know we are grateful and happy too!
Here is just a cute little meme I found on google about prayer:
Get ready, because here is more on parenting! This second post on parenting has a lot of the same ideas as my last post. Don't worry I won't write the same exact ideas but I am noticing how important the practices parents use while rearing their children are very important.
I really took away a lot of insights from this lesson because it is teaching me different parenting practices and styles. Although the number one point that I want to tell all of you about is the importance of the temple with families. In one of the chapters for this week's lesson I read about was about children becoming lost in their lives and the power of temple covenants that the parents made that kept the families together. To be honest, that is one of my deepest fears, is having children who fall away from the church but I have a personal testimony of families and that when we are all sealed, we can help those come back to the gospel. In this chapter it really focused on the importance of temple covenants and when people make them, there is a greater safety with being in the gospel. President Joseph Field Smith, a prophet of the church, said this "Being heirs [to the kingdom, through the sealing ordinance] they have claims upon the blessings of the gospel beyond what those not so born are entitled to receive. They may receive a greater guidance, a greater protection, a greater inspiration from the Spirit of the Lord; and then there is no power that can take them away from their parents... . Those born under the covenant, throughout all eternity, are the children of their parents. Nothing except the unpardonable sin, or sin unto death, can break this tie." This quote from my book really calmed by soul because I worry about my future children and I know that Heavenly Father has a special place in his heart for each and every one of us and will help us as we ask in our times of need. This chapter also made me realize that as parents calmly and slowly offer help and are always inviting and loving, children will slowly come back. The bottom line is to not loose faith and to keep doing what you know is right, and when the time is right those lost sheep will return and it will be a joyous reunion either on this earth or in heaven.
So I am going to end by boring (just kidding :) all of you with my final thoughts on parenting styles and practices. So in my last blog post I talked about parenting styles but practices are a little different. Practices are the way we teach and interact with our children. Now in different cultures people can treat their children differently but I have also realized that we need to talk and discipline each one of our children differently because they are all individuals and do not learn or act the same. There is also something called psychological control versus behavioral control. Barber (an author from the book) says this on psychological control, "a rather insidious type of control that potentially inhibits or intrudes upon psychological development through manipulation and exploitation of the parent-child bond (e.g., love-withdrawal and guilt induction), negative affect-laden expressions and criticisms (e.g., disappointment and shame), and excessive personal control (e.g., possessiveness, protectiveness)." Soooo by that discription I think we should all just agree to never do that, because I sure would not like to be treated like that by my parents. The way in which the books tells us is best is teaching children that they're behaviors are wrong and hold them accountable for their wrong doings.
Now again, I am no expert or parent yet but I know that as we cleave to our covenants and guide our children the best we can like Christ guides His, we will have help and be blessed and so will our children.
It is so funny how things "pop" up when you are needing ideas. As I am writing this post I saw an article on Facebook from Deseret News on effective ways of parenting. If you are interested check it out here!
One last thing, below is a Mormon Message that just came out on the parable of the prodigal son, I think this is very relevant to this lesson and we all need to remember to love and cherish those children who choose the right as well so jealously does not overcome their souls. This also shows that all of children may become lost for different reasons but through love and faith our families can bring themselves back together.
Happy day & Happy April! Also tune in tomorrow for the closing sessions of the LDS General Conference which you can watch online here!
Again, everyone is looking at this post title and silently saying to themselves, SHUT UP already Sam we know you are graduating in 8 days, you tell us everyday! Well yes, I do graduate in just three short weeks but that is not entirely what this post is about. I was really thinking about the meaning of graduation and what it means to me.
Graduation is more than just a ceremony to say, Hey great job with taking a million classes and spending way to many hours on homework! It is a time to celebrate a new chapter in life and reflect on all you are
"graduating" from.
Early this semester I wrote my goals for the semester, here they are as a refresher for both you and me:
Do not be late in school or work (snow delays do not count)
Get straight A's
Be productive and get projects done week by week
Do not procrastinate (that is a little big, maybe just procrastinate less... haha)
Come closer to my Heavenly Father through my experiences and school work
Find a job
Graduate!
So looking back on these, I have actually done a pretty good job of not being late, let's be real, I am really good at being late and this semester I have really made a lot of changes with that! Grades, working on that, looking like I could reach that goal so far. Productiveness, ya working on that one and procrastination but I am definitely not as stressed this semester so I think that goal is coming a long. Come closer to my Heavenly Father, check! The last two, working on both, I will keep you updated. Stay tuned for the job search blog too, that one has been a challenge to say the least. Now these goals, I may not have performed them perfectly but I look at these and most of them are work in progresses. As I start my new chapter, I hope to take these goals to my home projects and new job. Each time I am about to start something new I always tell myself, ya I will do that when I'm married or when I am done with school. Well now I have to, no more laziness. I will finish my decor in my home and finally bite the bullet and start crafting. That one may take awhile but I will learn to craft and sew and one day maybe I will be good at it.
See I always have goals, but with this graduation, I have finished with a lot of my goals and now it is time to make new ones, don't you worry I will probably have a blog all about new goals soon. So graduation is a time to reflect on all things I have accomplished and overcome. These last four years have not been easy AT ALL but man have they been worth it. I feel like I am not only graduating with a bachelor's degree in communications but one beginning stages of marriage, a growing testimony and a full heart.
I thought people were crazy when they told me you learn so much more at BYU-Idaho than just the information you need to know for your major, but I have to say you really do. My professors, bishops, friends and loved ones have taught me so much more than how to make a bouquet or write a PR plan. I have truly been taught on how to be a disciple of Christ.
My graduation is really telling me that I am coming one step closer to becoming more like Christ. I have completed this much of my education and through it I have learned of how to be a better example of the gospel and how to use my skills as a communications major to do so. Looking back on my time here at BYU-Idaho I would say that I have come and I have conquered. Thank you BYU-Idaho for teaching me to become the daughter of God I am supposed to be. I still have so much to learn but I know my Heavenly Father loves me and continues to teach me those life reminders I need each day to continue to grow.
I am looking forward to my next "graduation," that may not be an actual ceremony for a degree but in more of the life chapters and steps I will take like being a better wife, a mom, a grandma, and hopefully an example of the gospel. These graduations will come slowly and in steps but each one will be a major accomplishment to me.
So hopefully I have not bored all of you will my rant on "graduation" but I know that I will be walking away from this school with more than just a diploma.
As a disclosure, yes I am talking about parenting and no I am not pregnant. In this lesson of my Family class we focused on parenting. I have learned so many wonderful things and have really come away with the fact that even though I am not a parent yet I always need to be preparing to be one.
I have never realized how much goes into being a parent but besides getting married it is the top commitment you will make in your life. Parenting is not something that just comes to us, I have learned that parenting comes with lots of practice, love and help from our Heavenly Father and other family members. There has been so much I have learned from my readings in this lesson. The biggest take away I got from the beginning of this parenting lesson was the different types of how to parent.
Brigham Young said this on parenting, "Parents should never drive their children, but lead them along, giving them knowledge as their minds are prepared to receive it. Chastening may be necessary betimes, but parents should govern their children by faith rather than by the rod, leading kindly by good example into all truth and holiness." This quote from my textbook really stood out to me. Throughout my learning in this class I have really started to gain a sense of what kind of parenting I want to use and how important rearing children when they are small is. One thing parents need to remember is that each child is different and not every child has the same traits so each takes different types of love and patience.
There are three types of parenting that are mentioned in this lesson; coercive, permissive and authoritative. Coercive parenting defined by my textbook in chapter 10 "...is characterized by parents who deride, demean, or diminish children and teens by continually putting them in their place, putting them down, mocking them, or holding power over them via punitive or psychologically controlling means." This type of parenting really frightened me because growing up in this type of environment would really be detrimental to a child's future and relationship with their parents. Again, I am not a parent but parents are supposed to be loving and encouraging and demeaning.
Permissive parenting style "...is characterized by parents who overindulge children or neglect them by leaving them to their own devices." I think this parenting style is seen most in today's society because everyone is so busy and electronics really do take over our lives at times. I think this type of parenting is not something done on purpose, I think it happens when we get too busy and do not realize that we are letting life over take us.
The last parenting style is Authoritative. This type of parenting style if defined as, "fosters a positive emotional connection with children, provides for regulation that places fair and consistent limits on child behavior, and allows for reasonable child autonomy in decision making." I think this type of parenting is ideal because really you are teaching by example and helping your children become the people Heavenly Father has set them out to be. This type of parenting includes limits and love, two things the other types were lacking. Parents are to love their children unconditionally but give them limits on what they can and cannot do. Within limits I have learned that giving children options of what they can do within the limits you set shows them they still have their own choice but you set the guideline.
There is so much more I have learned but I do not want to bore everyone with what I found useful and I thought it was very interesting and thought provoking to know the different types of parenting styles.
In this lesson I also learned a lot about the beauties of mother and father hood. There was a lot of good information in both chapters but I just want to share a couple of things I thought were interesting.
Elder Ballard said this on motherhood, "There is no one perfect way to be a good mother. Each situation is unique. Each mother has different challenges, different skills and abilities, and certainly different children. The choice is different and unique for each mother and each family.... What matters is that a mother loves her children deeply and, in keeping with the devotion she has for God and her husband, prioritizes them above all else." I feel like this quote really entails all things in being a parent. I am so very excited to be a mom and through this chapter I have learned that it is exhausting and tiring but to be the best you can, it takes patience and reliance on the Lord.
I really enjoyed the chapter on fatherhood because this is something I shared with my husband and how we can work together in our parenting when we have children. What really stood out to be was the topic of the father presiding over the household like it says in The Proclamation. The father is to preside in the house in both a spiritual and financial way. The father uses his gift of the priesthood to lead his family and guide his children in the right ways to live. He also is to provide for his family financially and do his part to contribute. The chapter also talks about the father is a partner with many different parts of their child's life. They partner with the mother, the child and others in the child's life to really be a well rounded part to their child.
Being a parent is not easy but it sure seems worth it! I think parents have the best job but also have to work together to make life work. Heavenly Father loves and encourages the family and will help all of us who seek to have that. I feel that as we listen to words of the prophets and follow the counsel of the scriptures and The Proclamation we can set out to be the best parents for our children. My Parents!
I could not finish this post without putting in a little blurb about my parents. I truly am blessed to have the parents I do. I have learned a lot from both and they have taught me how to become a better person. I really loved that both my mom and dad taught me and reared me the best they could but really let me make my decisions and helped me learn along the way. I have learned so much for them. My mom is my best friend and my dad is hero. I would not be the person I am today without them. Thanks mom and dad for all you do, I sure love you!
I am so glad I am learning all of these things about being a parent and I cannot wait to learn and grow as a parent with my husband someday when we have children of our own.
My amazing parents!
Here is a great Mormon Message on Fatherhood and how this father really relies on his Father in Heaven to help him with his work each day. We truly have to remember that we have the roles we do as parents because of Heavenly Father. This is also an adorable video on the joys and duties of being a father.
Here is a great Mormon Message on the partnership between mothers and Heavenly Father. I think motherhood is the best job on earth and I cannot wait to be one someday, but I do know that I will need Heavenly Fathers help to guide me to being the best mother I can be.
